Paul Wesley’s journey from New Jersey newcomer to international stardom is as understated as it is compelling. Best known for portraying Stefan Salvatore on the long-running hit The Vampire Diaries, Wesley’s 20-year career has defied the usual Hollywood flashiness. While his sensitive portrayal of a conflicted vampire earned him legions of fans, his off-screen story is just as intriguing – and refreshingly low-key.
Wesley was born Pawel Tomasz Wasilewski in New Brunswick, New Jersey, on July 23, 1982. Growing up with Polish immigrant parents, he embraced acting early and, after a few minor TV roles, landed his big break as Stefan Salvatore in 2009. Audiences quickly connected with Stefan’s brooding intensity, but colleagues noticed something else: Wesley wasn’t content to only be in front of the camera.
As the show gained popularity, Wesley began directing, eventually helming several episodes of The Vampire Diaries. “Directing was always on my mind,” he told Interview Magazine. “I wanted to tell stories from every angle, not just through a single character.” That behind-the-scenes curiosity set him apart from many of his peers and has since led him to take on new challenges in TV and film production.
Despite his fame, fans and paparazzi rarely catch glimpses of Wesley in splashy headlines or tabloid controversies. He’s used his platform thoughtfully, advocating for causes like animal rights and climate awareness – but usually lets his actions, rather than his words, do the talking. As he once put it: “I’ve never been comfortable with too much attention. I’d rather let the work speak for itself.”
The Private Side of Paul Wesley
Wesley’s personal life, particularly his relationships, occasionally surfaces in the media – though he tries hard to keep things quiet. He’s currently dating model Natalie Kuckenburg, whom he reportedly began seeing in 2022. Rumors about an engagement have floated around, but neither Wesley nor Kuckenburg has confirmed them, and insiders say they’re simply enjoying their time together.
Previously, Wesley was married to jewelry designer Ines de Ramon. The two wed in a private ceremony in 2019, but separated amicably in 2022. Before that, he dated Vampire Diaries co-star Phoebe Tonkin, with whom he shared a four-year, on-and-off relationship that began when they met on set. Wesley’s first marriage was to actress Torrey DeVitto – another on-set romance from the film Killer Movie. They were together from 2007 and married in 2011, but parted ways two years later.
Throughout all of these relationships, Wesley has largely avoided public drama. He’s rarely spoken about breakups, but once told a fan at a convention: “Finding someone who truly gets you is rare. When you do, you hold onto that.” As with much in his life, there’s a sense of quiet wisdom and mutual respect.
Of course, his stardom sometimes sparks wild rumors – like the time he was linked to Emma Watson after being photographed out to dinner. Neither ever commented on the speculation. Wesley tends to ignore gossip rather than dignify it with a response.
For a man famous for playing an eternally youthful vampire, Wesley’s real-life approach to love and fame is surprisingly mature. “Hollywood relationships are tough,” he admitted to Men’s Health. “You’re always being watched, always traveling. Finding balance is the hardest part.”
Past Relationships
Natalie Kuckenburg
Ines de Ramon
Phoebe Tonkin
Torrey DeVitto
Marnette Patterson
Now, as he explores more directing and producing opportunities, Paul Wesley continues to put substance ahead of spectacle. Whether on set or off, he’s proven that being genuine matters more than making headlines.